During quarantine, I ran out of excuses and finally started doing something for achieving my dream. I never had problems with weight (objectively), but as long as I can remember I never had a belly that I wanted.
I always had a layer of fat covering my ab muscles and it bothered me. I tried to get rid of it when I wasn't even fully developed yet and almost fell for dangerous anorexia nervosa. I'm glad I did not, even though I was eating like I had an eating disorder. I clearly remember having a white yogurt and a HALF of nectarine for breakfast and 3 knäckenbrot s with 1/2 cottage cheese for lunch and another 3 knäckenbrot s with 1/2 cottage cheese for dinner. The scary thing was, that I thought that was normal. 125.7 lbs (57 kg) dropped to 114.6 lbs (52 kg) (for 5'6" = 168 cm) with few hours of exercise every day. The scarier thing was, that I was still fat in my eyes. Fortunately, I woke up before it was too late.
Fast-forward few years I stopped controlling my meals, ate horribly, made my health worse by eating fast food, oily fried meals, big portions like I was Arnold Schwarzenegger in his bodybuilder days... I tried to work out several times, but I always ended my attempts after a week or so, I felt so discouraged. Never had enough time, it never was the right time, etc. I lied to myself that it doesn't matter when it deep down bothered me. I stopped wearing fitting clothes, oversized sweaters, and T-shirts were my daily outfits. I even dodged wearing jeans whenever I could. Stretchy leggings were the only "pants" I liked to wear because it didn't remind me of how much fat I gathered during my ignorant years. Yeah, it got that bad but still wasn't enough for me to do something.
Then quarantine came and I am lucky enough to be able to work from home (home office)... Every excuse was terminated and here I am. Trying a new chapter of my life.
I eat
intuitively, eyeball portion by experience to not make myself sick. The only
sweets I eat are mainly expensive chocolate like Lindt or Belgian truffles,
etc. (Which is not that often, I don't like buying expensive things unless it's
on sale.) 99% of the time I eat homecooked meals. 3-5 times a day depending on
how hungry I feel.
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